Are You Emotionally Intelligent!
Easy Steps to Cultivate Your Emotional Intelligence, Read to Know.
15 years ago Intellectual Intelligence was so essential in the professional world. It was a needed skill, but time changes everything.
Studies show that people who have high IQ lacking social skills. Some of them have problems with controlling their emotions. Others lack empathy, some other with high tech skills lack self-awareness.
Moreover, they suffer from the social anxiety. People with high IQ, unfortunately, underestimate the power of emotions in general. They focus on logic and forget about the human beings’ feelings and emotion and a truly fact which is we are emotional creatures.
As a matter of fact, being emotionally intelligent in this hectic world is a crucial skill.
This arises a question! How do you know that you are an Emotional Intelligent?
Let me help you with this
People with low EQ are recognized by the following:
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Having difficulties with understanding others’ emotions
They don’t understand their own emotions, and for sure understanding other’s emotions is the next impossible.
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Playing the blame game all the time
They always blame others for their own frustrations, anxiety or even stress. They refuse to take responsibility for their emotions and decisions.
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Misjudging other’s emotions
They misunderstand others’ reactions and may call them overly sensitive as they misinterpret the situations.
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Having difficulty with keeping friends
They lose friends most of the time because they are cold and uncaring about others. They are walking around with a poker face. So, no wonder no one like to talk to a poker face.
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Getting into a lot of meaningless arguments
Because they don’t know how to control their thoughts and emotions effectively, they go into meaningless argument in order to vent their frustration or show their power to people.
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Feeling misunderstood
Complaining that they are always misunderstood by others, which feed their negative feelings towards themselves and others.
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They are judgmental
They jump to conclusions so fast. Their unnamed emotions are controlling their decisions.
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They are easily get pissed off
Lastly, some people lose their temper easily. But people with low EQ are quicker to lose their temper. They always get stressed.
Now we know how low EQ people think and act.
How many do you have of these qualities? two?
3 qualities? May be more?
Don’t worry, Emotional Intelligence is not in-born talent.
It’s kind of education. It’s a skill to be earned and learned. You can acquire and develop it anytime.
Surprisingly, learning this skill becomes a MUST in the professional world. Some studies show that most of business owners are looking for employees with high Emotional Intelligence rather than employees with high IQ.
Business world needs more of employees who can communicate effectively with clients. People with high interpersonal skills and multiple-tasking skills, employees can manage their emotions and maintain the positive attitude during the work pressure.
Let’s talk nitty gritty
What is the Emotional Intelligence?
EQ is that awareness of controlling your thoughts and emotions in critical and risky situations. It’s that empathy you feel towards people by imagining yourself in their shoes.
More:
It’s that self-motivation that drives you to do more in your life. And lastly, it’s about handling your relationships effectively.
I used to play the blame game all the way. I accused people for my frustration and stress.
I used to say that they don’t understand me, and do two things: complaining and whining.
YUP, I was from that harshly, not considerate low EQ people. But as we agreed, Time changes everything 
It all started with the realization of your own emotions, how to manage it and control it.
My mindset changed completely. I have become more empathy and worked more on self-motivation which drives me to achieve my goals in life.
Hence proven, it’s not too late. YOU can change too
But first and foremost, let’s know the 4 areas of Emotional Intelligence
According to Daniel Goldman, the Godfather of Emotional Intelligence whi starts with a ground breaking book” Emotional Intelligence” proved that Emotional intelligence has 4 main ares and massive number of competences.
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Self- awareness
To be aware of your own emotions is critical. It basically means that you have answers to these questions:
How do you interpret your thoughts?
What are the negative emotions come from?
How to maintain the positive mindset?
Simply put, realize and recognize YOUR emotions, knowing your strengthen and weaknesses, values and beliefs.
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Managing Emotions/ Self regulation
Right after being aware of your emotions, managing them is a MUST.
Manage your frustration, stress and anxiety.
There is a stereotypical thought claims that venting emotions can release stress.
And in my humble opinion, It’s half right, half wrong.
More: venting negative emotions will do no more but increase your negative emotions for longer time. You were angry, so to vent that feeling, you became more and more angry!
Nothing good come out of it.
What’s the solution?
I’ll tell you. DISTRACT yourself for some time, not for good
Distraction will compel your thoughts to direct its emotions in another way, another path. And then come back to the situation/ emotions with new brilliant eyes and perception.
If you are angry, go for a walk
If you are hurt, go and dance
If you are stressed, read a book or watch a comedy movie.
DISTRACTION is the key to overcome your negative emotions.
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Self-motivation
Motivation is the power that drives people to do more in their life. Motivation is critical in one’s progress. It’s the fuel which fills the vehicle of your life.
But what should you do if one morning you wake up and you find your vital motivation disappears!
Or no longer have you been affected by its power?
You will feel empty, right?
Everything around you are meaningless, bunch of crap.
That’s why to be self-motivated is essential in your progress. This massive power is inside you and only you
Can you imagine how amazing this is?
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Empathy
Unfortunately, our empathy is selective. We feel empathy with certain people in certain situations.
But we also need to correct this concept. We are all human beings.
One thing that makes people so aggressive with each other that they don’t understand each other.
Put yourself in the other’s shoes. And you will get it.
You will understand how he/she reacts in that way. This eventually will clear the air at least inside your mind and soul.
That’s why to get rid of grudges is significant to your emotional intelligence.
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Handling Relationships
Once you feel empathy towards people plus control your negative emotions and thoughts, you will maintain the positive mindset and this will level up your energy.
The irony of the ironies this is exactly what you need to maintain a healthy and rightfully relationship. Any relationship needs compassion, empathy and controlling some emotions.
Right?
After we knew the 4 areas of Emotional Intelligence, here is an expected question:
How we develop our emotional intelligence, how to interact in an effective way.
The answer to this question in the following tips and tricks
Focus Peer:
- Active listening
Listen effectively is not a cliché statement. Listening truly makes wonders.
Recall with me, how many times did you listen to someone not in order to understand, just to answer him!
How many times you were thinking about a reply more than the whole issue?
How many times did you talk to a person just to argue not to solve the problem!
Huh?
Many times, I believe.
Simply, it’s human nature.
Next time listen with whole mind and soul to the other partner.
Listen to fully understand, not to reply.
Tell you something, don’t you ever reply. Just listen.
Practice holding yourself back and prevent your brutally urge to reply and you will be astonished by the results.
MARK MY WORD
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Respond Don’t react
Your problem in reaction while you thought it was a respond.
Practice every time you face a critical situation, or you were provoked by some actions of somebody.
does he really mean it? Or it was an accident?
If he really means it, do I have to react furiously, or withdraw now will be better for me.
Thinking in this positive way will eventually make you calmer, and you will react in a logical and smarter way.
Bare in your mind that reaction is not the right things to do, you need to respond rightfully.
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Practice self-awareness
Being aware of your own emotions and know the difference between the stress, frustration, anger and even depression will increase your Emotional Intelligence.
People’s problem in this issue that they mixed it up all the emotions, they don’t really understand how they feel right now, or how they should react.
That’s why they are easily get pissed off.
Name your feeling right now, see if you are in a good mood or not, if not try to distract yourself. Go do something fun.
After some time, name again your feeling in that moment.
Rinse and repeat.
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Take critique well
One of human being’s weakness point is the criticism. NO one likes to be criticized.
It’s our nature.
In any situation if you have a hunch that someone is about to criticize you! You will shoot him with varied kinds of words. You will be massively aggressive and will tell him/her off definitely.
But what if you tame yourself to accept whatever. What if you train your mind to be in normal state when anyone tries to criticize you?
Changing your mindset will do the trick!
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Empathize with others
As we agreed, empathy is essential to increase your Emotional Intelligence.
Being considerate and compassionate about others will befit the man kind.
Yes, it’s true.
The world is terrible, it’s awful enough.
We need to be kind to each other. Think it that way.
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Be approachable
Being sociable and approachable is significant. Be the person who can be reachable and add-value icon for others. This will increase your self-esteem and your EQ in the same exact time.
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Practice leadership skills
Could you define who is a leader?
Simply, the one who can inspire, motivate, guide others. He is a problem solver, organizer and maintaining his positive mindset in the critical situations. He can perceive the good in everything around him.
Be that one.
Practice these qualities with your family, peers, friends and employees.
These steps will increase your emotional intelligence dramatically.
